The Box Arrives (Finally)
It took four weeks. Four. Weeks. I kept checking the tracking like some desperate raccoon hunting for scraps behind a diner, but—yeah, three weeks processing and then another week for shipping. Not exactly Amazon Prime speeds, but whatever. When it finally landed on my porch, the packaging was... blank. Like, aggressively plain. No markings at all. Even my nosy neighbor who always seems to be outside didn’t give me the side-eye this time.
First Encounter With All That Silicone
Dragging 88 lbs of life size silicone sex doll up two flights of stairs is not glamorous. I nearly threw out my back—she’s 5 feet 4 inches tall (164 cm), which is basically a small adult human if you squint and ignore the fact that she’s made of full silicone from head to toe.
There’s something weirdly impressive about feeling how solid she is—the steel skeleton with movable joints gives her this strange lifelikeness, almost too much sometimes? Her skin feels cool at first but warms up a little when you touch it longer than you probably should admit.
Proportions That Make You Do a Double Take
Okay, let’s talk numbers because people always want those: bust 33 inches (J-Cup territory), under-bust 23.6 inches, waist just over 22 inches, hips nearly 38 inches—those are cartoonish proportions in real life but somehow work here? Her big boobs and big butt are... well, they’re there for a reason.
The legs are long—long legs are kind of hypnotic when you’re moving her around or dressing her up (which takes more effort than anticipated). It’s easy to get lost in details like that juicy curve from waist to hip or how her breasts settle differently depending on position; sometimes uncanny valley hits hard and other times it doesn’t even register.
The Details Nobody Tells You
People online rave about “hole depth” like it’s some sacred metric: vagina is 7.1 inches deep and anus sits at about 6.3 inches—which honestly sounds clinical until you realize it matters if you’re using her for more than just display.
I remember thinking “Does anyone actually measure this stuff?” Apparently yes—and now I’m one of them because curiosity gets the better of everyone eventually.
Her joints click softly when moved; not loud enough to break immersion but enough to remind you she isn’t alive (thank god?). She holds poses pretty well thanks to that steel skeleton; standing can be tricky though unless you’re careful with balance.
The Slightly Annoying Parts
Let me just say: cleaning isn’t fun. It never is with these things—no matter what some forum guy tells you about ‘easy maintenance’. You need patience and towels and sometimes an existential pep talk before getting started.
It took me a while to appreciate the differences between various life size silicone sex dolls, but once you see a well-made one in person, the quality speaks for itself.
And storage? Unless your closet is Narnia-sized, hiding an anatomically correct Greek goddess isn’t as simple as shoving her under the bed—not unless your bed is unusually high off the ground anyway.
A Tangent About Shipping & Discretion
Weirdly enough—I got more anxious waiting for delivery than actually owning Evangeline herself. Free international shipping sounds nice until you're stuck refreshing tracking links every day for almost a month straight… But hey, discreet packaging means nobody knows what’s inside except maybe your dog who sniffs everything anyway.
Random Realization While Dressing Her Up
Trying different outfits on Evangeline turned out way more entertaining than expected—like playing dress-up as an adult with no judgmental siblings around this time? Clothes fit differently on full silicone bodies compared to humans; tight jeans look painted-on perfect while loose shirts hang off in odd ways that make me laugh sometimes.
Also: wigs change everything—a blonde bombshell one day and then suddenly dark-haired Greek goddess vibes next morning without any warning (or emotional baggage).
Not Quite What I Expected… And Yet
I thought having a busty sex doll would feel weirder than it does—it does feel weird sometimes—but there are moments where she looks so real sitting by my window that I forget she isn’t going to ask me why I’ve spent two hours scrolling memes instead of working again today.
Anyway—Evangeline isn’t magic or anything mystical despite all the Greek goddess branding hype floating around online… She’s just really good silicone shaped into someone who could probably stop traffic if she ever stood up outside my apartment—which hopefully never happens because explaining that would take years off my life expectancy.
That’s pretty much where I am right now with this whole thing—a little bemused, slightly tired (in every sense), still figuring out where exactly she fits into daily routine beyond being unexpectedly decent company during late-night movie marathons when nobody else picks up their phone.
Maybe tomorrow I'll try putting her in actual Greek robes or something ridiculous just for kicks.
