What Even Is This?
(And Why Am I Writing About It)
I’ll just say it: reviewing a life size silicone sex doll wasn’t on my 2024 bingo card. But here we are, because apparently the internet is obsessed with these things and, well, people seem to want real talk instead of those weirdly enthusiastic “best sex dolls of the year” lists. You know the ones—like they’re sponsored by Big Silicone or something.
Balia is this Italian lingerie-inspired D-cup bombshell. Five foot three, which is taller than you’d expect when you see her in person. She’s got that “I belong in a Milan boutique window” vibe but also looks like she could bench press me if she wanted (not literally, but still). Anyway—if you’re reading this you’ve probably seen all the perfect promo pics already. Let’s get into what actually matters.
The Specs That Jump Out
Right off the bat: she weighs almost 95 lbs out of the box (43 kg), which surprised me. There’s an option for weight reduction that brings her down to about 76 lbs (34.4 kg). Not feather-light either way, but carrying her up stairs isn’t exactly casual cardio.
Her measurements are kind of wild—32.6 bust, 25.6 under bust, 24 waist, 39.4 hips—and yeah, D-cup breasts that feel… uncanny at first touch? Not bad-uncanny though; more like “wait, this is really silicone?” Her butt is huge too (seriously), so if you’re looking for a big butt sex doll with long legs and tan skin and all that—you’ll probably be happy.
The “hole depth” stats always make me laugh when I see them listed out: vagina at 6.7 inches deep, anus at 6.6 inches, mouth at 5.1 inches—which I guess matters if you have strong opinions about anatomical realism? Some people do! No judgment.
Using Her Feels Oddly Mundane After Awhile
First day I set her up—mentally checked out from work and honestly just curious—I remember thinking it was going to be some surreal experience. But after a while it gets weirdly normal? Like moving furniture around or assembling IKEA stuff alone on a Sunday afternoon.
The steel skeleton with movable joints means you can pose her pretty much however you want (within reason). Sometimes the joints are stiff though; had to wiggle one arm back into place and felt like I was going to accidentally break something expensive.
There’s definitely a learning curve if you’ve never owned a tall silicone sex doll before—dressing her takes patience unless your idea of fun is wrestling with spandex for twenty minutes straight.
Compared to what was available a few years ago, today's best silicone sex dolls are on a completely different level of realism.
Shipping & Stealth Mode
One thing everyone worries about: shipping embarrassment. Here’s where Balia gets points—the packaging really is discreet; plain box, nothing screaming “hey neighbors look what I ordered!” Still took about three weeks from order to arrival (processing plus shipping), which feels forever in Amazon Prime time but whatever.
She ships internationally for free too—which sounds cool until customs decides they need to inspect your mysterious heavy package from Italy—but mine showed up without drama.
Small Details That Caught Me Off Guard
Her feet are women’s size 6-6.5—not really relevant unless you plan on buying shoes for her (some people do). The tan finish looks better in low light than under harsh daylight bulbs; not sure why manufacturers don’t mention that more often.
Another thing: cleaning takes longer than anyone admits online… especially after actual use. If anyone tells you otherwise they’re lying or skipping steps.
Also—it’s easy to get lazy and leave her sitting somewhere awkwardly for days because moving her around isn’t exactly effortless once novelty wears off.
Is It Worth It?
Well…
Honestly—I’m not sold on whether any life size sex doll changes your world or whatever those review sites promise (“fulfills every fantasy!” etc.). Maybe if companionship means having someone silently judging your Netflix choices from across the room…?
But there’s something oddly comforting about having Balia around sometimes—even if it makes no logical sense and feels faintly ridiculous typing it out now.
I keep thinking maybe one day I’ll put away all these accessories and just let her hang out in storage—but then again… maybe not yet
